Skip to main content

Memento Mori

I am driving into the sunset.  The colors of the sky are brilliant; as pinks, oranges and reds dominate the skyline.  The sun continues to set and the palate changes into the darker hues.  It feels as if I'm driving into heaven itself as I make my way down some random country lane.

Change and loss have been on my mind a lot this October.  We celebrated the second anniversary of our move from Florida quietly.  We remembered the passing of my mother quietly and are dealing with the loss of Susan's father the best we can.   Her father passed earlier this evening.

It's only a matter of time for my father as well. Death and change have been on my mind as of late.  

How do you deal with the passing of a parent?  How do you deal with the the realization of our own mortality?  Because like it or not we are next in line.  

The coming days will be filled with grief as Susan’s family members say goodbye to their Dad.  I will be there beside them to provide what comfort I can.  One of the biggest regrets I have in my life was not being there to provide comfort for another important woman in my life when her mother died.  I will not fail this one.

We have spoken briefly about her beliefs.  She feels that there is more to this world as well although she cannot define what that is.  I understand that.  It is like an early morning fog that obscures our view of the valley below.  We know it’s there, we know it’s beautiful but we cannot see it yet.

So we wait for the fog to lift and we enter the valley. 

 

When I talk about wanting to plant fruit trees on my property and leave behind a yard full of edible and medicinal plants for the next generation, that will be my legacy.  I'm basically trying to help the next generation along.  I'm doing my small part to fight climate change.  It's my hope that some wandering souls in the wasteland that my generation helped create will take refuge here and give thanks.   

 I am not going to bore you, gentle reader, with philosophical or religious texts.  Although I will say this, that I do believe is something greater than this world...although what it is defies any rational or logical thought.  This world is too beautiful and mysterious.The fact that the leaves change from green to red and gold only to fall upon the ground and provide food and nutrients to the tree is the providence of science.   The fact that we can take comfort in and recognize the beauty of those falling leaves in another thing entirely.

While I am in no hurry to die, I do not fear death.  For I will return to the natural world. 

If anything scares me...it is the fact that I will stop "living".  That the joys of this world - the kiss and touch of a wonderful woman, the subtle joys of a good wine or tasteful dish...the ability of music to shake our very souls...will simply cease to be experienced.  That is what I fear.

Remember that you to are mortal.

Labels:
Location: Stoneboro, PA 16153, USA

Comments

Post a Comment

What all the cool kids are reading.

Honoring the past - Thinking more about "invasive" plant species.

 Recently I've been giving some thought to invasive species.  I had received both positive and negative feedback on the blog post concerning kudzu and recently I came across a very well hidden, and very small, wild cherry tree while doing some yard work.  Since it's against the house it would have to be removed since the root systems could damage my foundation.   A buddy of mine at work was asking if I was going to transfer it, his logic being that it was a fruiting tree that would not only attract a variety of pollinator's but that the deer would eat the bark and cherries, keeping them away from the garden (which Sue and I swore we were not going to do this year).  It occurred to me that I was going to have to do a slightly better job of identification, since black cherries are native to America , where as other types of cherries are not.  Being able to make a precise identification would be helpful.   I used to be able to identify all these tre...
Post a Comment
Read more

A sense of time in place - traveling in Central PA

One of the first items that Sue and I bought as a couple all those years ago was a grandfather clock.  We used to snuggle under the blanket and listen to the chimes on the hour, the sound filling our house with a warmth and resonance.   That clock is nothing special, being simple in its design and technology.  It's accurate because of the beauty of physics and math...and is a lost art form in its own right. I thought a lot about time and place as we traveled this week.  I thought a lot about place.   Sue and I finally took a brief vacation recently.  Due to circumstances beyond our control, every plan we had made to get away earlier in the year came to naught.  My father became ill and ended up in the hospital which we decided to stay home "just in case."  He ended up in the hospital at least three times this past year, and I decided to spend what time I could with him. Family, after all, is what brought us back to Pennsylvania. We had p...
3 comments
Read more

Maybe we need to rethink invasive species???

Hi. As the writer of the post and feel that I need to clarify something. I do not advocate the planting of invasive species. The point that I'm trying to make, and clearly didn't, is that perhaps we should be thinking about an invasive species in a different light. Apples, figs and other crops are clearly non native to America and Europe but are widely cultivated because they have use to humans as a food source, animal feed, etc. Kudzu is an edible plant and although it is clearly harmful can it be used someway by humans? It's a food source, it's been used as a cloth and is showing some use as a building material. All I'm trying to do is to create discussion on how we can use invasive plants in new ways.   It's mid April here in Western Pennsylvania and so far it's been warm and wet.  The buzz of lawnmowers fill the air as I gallivant through my back yard collecting dandelions to make some tea and bread with them.  I had always known that they w...
Post a Comment
Read more